Thick Mucus2 Days Before Periods

If you read this

This time I do not want to re-enter your life and then leave. Since 20 years I have not shot the stone and hide the hand. This time I will not want to play without trying (actually I was never playing with you, was chibola, was stupid and I was wrong in the brain. Well, that has not changed much, but now I think me more.)
If you read me, if I have ever read, give me a smoke signal, join me in a cyber place and give me your mailing address. (I dare not ask you, has been too long, and may sound that I want to do not know what the hell ...). In fact all I want is to give your poem, which I always spoke, that I showed you just once, you did not believe that there was, and I published in a magazine this summer. I want to give, I want you to have it finally is more yours than mine. I might not understand, you may not see reflected in the poem, you might not know that I speak Xuxa, but it is for you and I wrote it from the donf of my heart and my brain twisted. I know that maybe is silly they ask, be ridiculous to do so, a bastard ... I remember you now (I have never forgotten you, I never stopped thinking of you ... ever), but I do not want to help (my shrink says that one should not say I can not when the word is actually I do not want, well I do not want help). I do not want to avoid thinking about you a little, want to send the poem and you want to say nice memory.
I sincerely hope you do better than me, you deserve it completely. You always have deserved it more than me. I know that a chance of life may no longer read me, maybe I do not remember, but if you do, could you give me a smoke signal, I'll give you return your poem, just that promise?